KS3 · English

Writing a PEE paragraph about a play

Here’s a trap: you add a cracking quotation, then ‘explain’ it by saying it again in other words. Feels like thinking. It isn’t. Let’s fix that.

English · Writing about plays

Take a model paragraph apart

Tap each highlighted move to see what it’s doing and why it works.

THE LAST FERRY by Dara Whitlock Act 2, Scene 1 (a play and extract invented for this lesson) [Mara sits on her suitcase in a cold harbour waiting room. Her brother Toby paces by the door.] [Mara grips the handle of her suitcase and does not look up.] MARA: I’m not going. Not tonight. TOBY: [checking his watch] The last ferry leaves in ten minutes. MARA: Then it can leave without me. A MODEL PARAGRAPH In Act 2, Scene 1 of The Last Ferry, Dara Whitlock presents Mara as someone who is determined to stay, even though she is frightened of leaving. Whitlock opens the scene with the stage direction ‘Mara grips the handle of her suitcase and does not look up’, which shows her clinging to something familiar while avoiding her brother’s eyes. This suggests her refusal is driven less by stubbornness than by fear, because she cannot even face Toby as she says it. Her blunt line ‘I’m not going. Not tonight.’ fits this: the short sentences sound firm, yet ‘Not tonight’ leaves the door open, as if she has not ruled out leaving for good. By giving Mara a firm voice but nervous body language, Whitlock shows that her determination to stay is covering a fear of leaving.
Play, extract and paragraph invented for this lesson

Nothing here comes from a real play. The extract is made up so you can see the moves clearly.

Tap a highlighted part of the paragraph to read the teacher’s note beside it.

Reading “which shows her clinging to something familiar while avoiding her brother’s eyes. This suggests her refusal is driven less by stubbornness than by fear, because she cannot even face Toby as she says it.”

Analysis: develops the idea (stage directions)

What to notice

Look at what this does not do: it doesn’t say ‘she holds her case and doesn’t look up’ in other words. It takes the topic sentence’s idea one step further, adding fear underneath the determination, and it uses a dramatic method (the stage direction) to get there.

Effect

The idea has moved on. Mara isn’t only stubborn; she is scared too.

Focused phrase “which shows her clinging to something familiar while avoiding her brother’s eyes. This suggests her refusal is driven less by stubbornness than by fear, because she cannot even face Toby as she says it.”. technique Analysis: develops the idea (stage directions). Look at what this does not do: it doesn’t say ‘she holds her case and doesn’t look up’ in other words. It takes the topic sentence’s idea one step further, adding fear underneath the determination, and it uses a dramatic method (the stage direction) to get there.. effect: The idea has moved on. Mara isn’t only stubborn; she is scared too.

Step one · Annotate the question

Before you write a word, find what the question is asking

Question about The Last Ferry

How does Dara Whitlock present Mara’s feelings about leaving in Act 2, Scene 1 of The Last Ferry?

Question 1 of 2

Tap the words that tell you which character your paragraph must focus on.

Tap the words in the passage that prove your answer.

Step two · The topic sentence

Which topic sentences are strong?

Tick every feature each topic sentence actually has. Then check your grid and see which sentences fall short, and where.

In Act 2, Scene 1 of The Last Ferry, Dara Whitlock presents Mara as determined to stay, even though she is frightened of leaving.
Mara is determined to stay in The Last Ferry.
Dara Whitlock writes a play about a brother and sister at a harbour.
In Act 2, Scene 1, Dara Whitlock presents Toby.
Dara Whitlock presents Toby as impatient in The Last Ferry.

Step three · The line you have to cross

Analysis or paraphrase?

The topic sentence says Whitlock presents Mara as determined to stay, even though she is frightened of leaving. The embedded quotation is ‘Then it can leave without me.’ Each sentence below could come next. Is it analysis or paraphrase?

Still to sort

Analysis (0)

Develops the topic sentence’s idea, explores a dramatic method, links back.

Where the line is: It adds something new about the idea, rather than just saying what the words mean.

Paraphrase (0)

Rewords what the quoted words mean.

Where the line is: If we could swap it in for the quotation without learning anything new about Mara, it is paraphrase.

5 of 5 still to sort.

Step four · Your turn

Write a paragraph, tick it, then redraft one sentence

[Toby stops pacing. He sets down his bag and sits beside her.] TOBY: I’ll stay till the next one, then. MARA: [smiling for the first time] You don’t have to.

How does Dara Whitlock present Toby in this part of Act 2, Scene 1 of The Last Ferry? Write one paragraph. Start with a topic sentence, embed at least one quotation, and analyse it. [6 marks]

0 words · your answer stays on this page and is not sent anywhere.

WHAT YOU'VE LEARNED

A quick recap of today's lesson.

Claim it. Prove it. Push it further.

What you need to know

  • To annotate is to add short notes with your own ideas. Annotating the question is the first step of planning.
  • Annotate the question first. It keeps you on the right topic, not writing everything you know about the play.
  • Have a goSam gets the question ‘How does the writer show Captain Reyes’s fear in Act 1, Scene 2?’ and confidently writes four pages on the whole plot. What did Sam skip?

    Annotating the question first, to spot the character (Captain Reyes) and the idea (fear).

    Annotating tells you what to write about, so you don’t pour out everything you know about the play.

  • A strong topic sentence names the author, picks a specific character, states an idea about that character and gives the act and scene.
  • Have a goWhat is missing from this topic sentence? ‘In Act 1, Scene 3, Captain Reyes is shown as fearless.’

    The author’s name.

    It has a specific character, an idea about him and the act and scene, but a strong topic sentence also names the author.

  • Dramatic methods are the tools a playwright uses to create their work, for example characterisation, setting, language choices and stage directions.
  • A stage direction is text in a script that says how a scene should be staged, or how an actor should say a line.
  • Support your topic sentence with embedded quotations from dialogue or stage directions. A paragraph can use more than one.
  • Analysis develops the idea in your topic sentence, explores dramatic methods, and links back to the topic sentence.
  • Rewording what a word means is paraphrase, not analysis. It doesn’t push your idea anywhere.
  • Have a goA paragraph has a good topic sentence and two quotations, but every later sentence just rewords a quotation. Which job is nobody doing?

    Developing the topic sentence’s idea, and linking back to it.

    Rewording only tells us what the words mean. Analysis pushes the idea on, explores dramatic methods and links back.

  • To evaluate is to look carefully and make a judgement. Evaluate model paragraphs, then act on feedback by redrafting.
  • When you redraft, amend your vocabulary, grammar and structure so the writing is more coherent and effective.

The big picture

This is the PEE paragraph (Point, Evidence, Explain), taught here with sharper names: topic sentence, evidence and analysis. A strong paragraph about a play starts from an annotated question, opens with a topic sentence that makes a claim, supports it with quotations from dialogue or stage directions embedded in your writing, and analyses them. Analysis develops the topic sentence’s idea, explores dramatic methods and links back; rewording what the words mean is only paraphrase. Then you evaluate and redraft.

Key points

1Annotate the question first so your paragraph stays on the right topic.
2A strong topic sentence has four features: the author, a specific character, an idea about that character, and the act and scene.
3Embed quotations from dialogue or stage directions in your own sentences; use more than one if the paragraph needs it.
4Analysis develops the topic sentence’s idea, explores dramatic methods and links back to the topic sentence.
5Rewording what a word means is paraphrase, not analysis.
6Evaluate your paragraph, act on the feedback by redrafting, and improve vocabulary, grammar and structure.

Worked example

Problem

The topic sentence says Whitlock presents Mara as determined to stay, even though she is frightened of leaving. After the embedded quotation ‘The last ferry leaves in ten minutes’, a writer adds: ‘This means the ferry will leave soon.’ Turn that sentence into analysis.

⚠ Watch out

Explaining a quotation by rewording it and calling that analysis. If your sentence could replace the quotation without telling us anything new about the character, it is paraphrase. Push the topic sentence’s idea further instead.

🧠

Memory hook

A paraphrase is a mirror: it shows the quotation back to you. Analysis is a ladder: it takes your idea up a step.

✓

Check yourself

Look at your paragraph. Can you point to a topic sentence with all four features, an embedded quotation, analysis that develops the idea, and a link back? Which is weakest?

Flashcards

(12)
What does it mean to annotate?
To add short notes to a piece of text with your own ideas and comments.
Why annotate the question before you write?
It is the first step of planning, and it keeps you on the right topic rather than writing everything you know about the play.
What four features make a strong topic sentence?
It includes the author’s name, focuses on a specific character, states an idea about that character, and specifies the act and scene.
What are dramatic methods?
The tools a playwright uses to create their work, for example characterisation, setting, language choices and stage directions.
What is a stage direction?
Text in a play script that gives information about how a scene should be staged, or how an actor should say a particular line.
Where can the evidence in your paragraph come from?
Quotations from dialogue or from stage directions, embedded within your writing. You can use more than one.
Why is rewording a quotation not analysis?
Rewording what a word means is paraphrase. It doesn’t develop the topic sentence’s idea.
What should analysis of a quotation do?
Develop the idea in the topic sentence, look at dramatic methods, and link back to the topic sentence.
What does it mean to evaluate?
To look at something carefully and make a judgement about it.
What do you do with feedback on your paragraph?
Act on it by redrafting, and use the evaluation to develop your own writing.
What can you change when you redraft?
Your vocabulary, grammar and structure, to improve the coherence and overall effectiveness of the writing.
What are the moves of a model paragraph about a play?
A topic sentence, embedded evidence from dialogue or stage directions, then analysis that develops the idea and links back to the topic sentence.

Tap any card to flip it, or use Study as deck to go through them one at a time. In the full lesson these run as a spaced-repetition deck — you rate each card Hard, Good or Easy and the tricky ones keep coming back until they stick.

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